Joke Number One
Jack: How the hell did your flat mate got injured so badly
Michael: Well, we had a bat saying who can pull their body out of the window the most, well, he won.
Joke Number Two
Ms Helen is a teacher, one day she said to a group of year seven students telling them to appear more caring to their parents, saying that they should ask whether they are tired from work.
The next day, Ms Helen want the students to tell them their parent's response.
The first student raise his hand and said "My mum said how much money do you own this time? Make it quick."
The second student yell out saying "That is nothing, my Dad said, which subject did you got another F this time?"